Under pressure

[Gaynor]

I have a 15 yr old daughter, and she is mad about bikes, she knows what she wants Source BMX » United Recruit RN1 BMX Bike » United BMX 2011 » BMX Bikes (I think it's pricey) but anyway I go looking on the sights for this bike, and see cheaper models but hers is United BMX 2011, for £75 cheaper I can get her the United BMX 2010, but its not her colour she states, I argue that it's pointless having a bike in this area, but am I being hypocritical as I have always had bikes of my own, but if she were to have an accident I couldn't live with the fact that I had bought her a bike in the first place, now if we lived in say Tonbridge, where family live I would gladly get her a bike, but here, I really don't think it's a good idea at all..
I remember when I was her age and my dad took me to a bike shop and bought be one of those red Chopper bikes, I was so happy with it, but I lived In London, and there I could ride all over, I basically want my daughter to feel as happy/excited as I did when I was her age, but surely if you are in the wrong area then the danger aspects always should come first, no matter how much she keeps pleading 'Oh please, please can I have that bike' (If I had £1 for everytime she has asked I could buy one of each of the electric bikes from Onbikes, really, it's that bad, she knows I can be a soft touch)

I had a quick look in Halfords, they didn't sell 'her bike' but they do sell electric bikes, two by the looks of it.. the Urban Mover Sprite and the
Urban Mover Motion Electric Mountain Bike, I did notice that the battery's they currently have are 9 ah nickel metal hydride ? I think it said this on one of their videos. Although with the Urban mover sprite it states 'Reliable lightweight Panasonic lithium ion battery holds its charge longer than a lead acid battery'
So it's not really telling you what you are getting is it...



Gaynor

....Think on this one I have got to stick to my intutition.

 

[lemmy]

You're her mother - do you have the final say or does she?

 

[Patrick]

How about getting her to do bikeability training, it's all about riding safely in traffic.

http://www.bikeability.org.uk/

You could say something like she can have the BMX she wants when she completes level 3.

Alternatively you could get a copy of Cyclecraft and work through the training with her

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Cyclecraft-complete-enjoyable-cycling-children/dp/0117037400/

In chapter two, "Advice to parents", it even talks about kids wanting BMX bikes when parents want them to have something more suitable.

 

[Gaynor]

Cyclecraft: the complete guide to safe and enjoyable cycling for adults and children: Amazon.co.uk: John Franklin, Stationery Office: Books

I have just ordered the book, it's a shame that the first link is just a bit too far, with a 4 hour return train ride.
Thankyou very much, i wanted something like this for the both of us, although I would have to really think if it's just too dangerous to buy her (daughter) a bike.

Gaynor

 

[Gaynor]

You're her mother - do you have the final say or does she?

If only all children were the same, I have a son of 13 and he does what he is told, he is a very hard worker in school, he is Autistic and does find some things hard and gets frustrated, so has his moments.

My daughter on the other hand is 'in the mix' they (the Dr's, specialist) she has ASD, ADHD) but she goes to a 'normal school and isnt statemented like her sibling. She is very 'difficault' at times, and rarely listens, or turns herself off, and misbehaves, she is a teenager, not that I accept that, but many children try to push the boundrys.

She always wants the last word!

At the end of the day, of course, I make the decisions, but on the bike issue its something I wish i could buy her. (without worrying something awful will happen)

My mother is the same with me, and im an adult, she doesnt like the fact I own an E bike, and she hates the idea, she thinks its very dangerous, and states how many people have had road accidents on their e bike.

Gaynor

 

[Trevor Holloway]

Being a parent too, I have to accept that once my 15 year old son is 16 he can get himself a job and buy his own motorbike (he already has his eye on my 850cc sportsbike) !

A sensible bicycle now - then an e-bike later should teach them the road craft every road user needs.

 

[Mussels]

Don't you live in Hastings Gaynor? I've been there a few times and the traffic didn't seem particularly dangerous, personally I'd let my kids ride bikes on the roads as it will stop them getting lazy and fat. If she has ridden a BMX and likes them then I'd go with that as she will ride it, a sensible bike will be too embarassing and sit in the shed gathering dust. I see plenty of kids on BMX bikes who can keep up with me so they aren't that bad.

 

[lemmy]

Don't you live in Hastings Gaynor?.

I lived in Hastings ten years ago and actually gave up cycling when we moved there, so dangerous are the cycling conditions. This is from someone who did and still does, on a more or less daily basis, cycle round central London and the south west suburbs.

The council attempted to help and put in a cycle lane all the way down the promenade but having twice been attacked while using it at the St Leonards End, I reverted to my car and locked doors

No matter how pushy your children, Gaynor, it would be a bad lesson for them if you paid an extra £75 for a bike on a whim over colour, even if you were made of money.

 

[Dynamic Position]

Its difficult when children want something! Given your daughters age perhaps you could strike a deal? She gets the bike she wants providing she passes all her school exams (with specific grades you specify). If she messes up she gets the cheaper bike. My son usually opts for a cash option. Its quite good because when he has to spend the money to make a purchase he tends to be more careful. Children respond quite well to bribes and if it improved their school work it is a good thing?

 

[Gaynor]

Don't you live in Hastings Gaynor? I've been there a few times and the traffic didn't seem particularly dangerous, personally I'd let my kids ride bikes on the roads as it will stop them getting lazy and fat. If she has ridden a BMX and likes them then I'd go with that as she will ride it, a sensible bike will be too embarassing and sit in the shed gathering dust. I see plenty of kids on BMX bikes who can keep up with me so they aren't that bad.

Yes, I live in Hastings (wow, 13 yrs now, I used to be a Londoner, south London)
The problem with this area is the steepness, and having to squeeze the brake every few seconds, when you get down to the bottom, to the pier, you look up, and up, it's daunting to think you have to get all that way back up, there are actually lifts to get people up the hills, but they are not in working order.
My daughter is in tears right now, as I am saying she has to wait, but she tells me she's done her cycling proficiency test (I didn't know this as she was in care when I was sick, therefore done the test there) some drivers, as we all know can be complete nuttters and think they own the roads, I get afraid at times, even though I try to give as much space as possible, I am almost on the pavement, yeah its great fun once you are down the bottom, but going to Bexhill for instance the crossroads and traffic there is a nightmare, the pavements are empty so I always stick to them, that's about a 10 miles return trip, but the battery wouldn't last to the most important part of the journey. both my kids are quite on the skinny side, I have no idea why as they eat loads my son is much more into his computer, and Nintendo games ect, he goes sports and swimming at school but I would like him to do a lot more, he needs to build up muscles, my daughters very active, infact she cant keep still.

I lived in Hastings ten years ago and actually gave up cycling when we moved there, so dangerous are the cycling conditions. This is from someone who did and still does, on a more or less daily basis, cycle round central London and the south west suburbs.

The council attempted to help and put in a cycle lane all the way down the promenade but having twice been attacked while using it at the St Leonard's End, I reverted to my car and locked doors

No matter how pushy your children, Gaynor, it would be a bad lesson for them if you paid an extra £75 for a bike on a whim over colour, even if you were made of money.

Exactly, when my daughter lived in Tonbridge I felt she was safe as she was across the road from the park, and it was flat, and yes some areas, like you mention St Leonard's have some dodgey people about, and you have to pass that area to get to the one cycling path, there is a lot of theft in that area, which is just 40 minutes walk from here, im right up behind the castle, then keep going up, it actually hurts your calf's each time you walk up, well I bought those BMT shoes, that give you a work out, but phew wearing them while walking upwards does hurt.
Hmm, my daughter is adamant about the bike and the colour, but right now she is behaving in such a destructive manner, while im topping up her mobile with another £20 ...she wont be getting anything if she carry's on, it's like, Oh you wont get me a bike then I can behave as bad as I want, No she has to know it doesn't work like that, when I was her age, and younger even, I worked part time in a cafe at weekends at age 12, and at age 15 I worked full time in the westend of London in a shop in Carnaby street, as I recall I got less than a £1 an hour, but I couldn't complain really, as really I was meant to be at school still, but it seems a lot of kids nowadays get it all handed on a plate, and im just as bad, I am a single parent, with no family nearby, it's hard to juggle at times.

ooops sorry to go on a tangent i always seem to go adrift in my posts.

Gaynor